Aspen's Animal Doppelgangers
So, we already know this place can be a bit of damn zoo, am I right? Well, it just so happens that in my spare time around this place (and maybe enjoying a bit of extra free time in the archives *wink wink*), I may have stumbled on some less than flattering photographs of some of you people. I mean, they’re pretty damn hilarious themselves. BUT. and I mean a very fucking big BUTT. It’s so much FUN to compare them to a few choice photos I found of you guys and your animals and just some snapshots from old Discovery Channel booklets and shit. So, without further ado, I bring to you some Animal Doppelgangers. Enjoy that. Relish it. (It’s not as fun as blood, but it’s something)

- From : Aspen Elysium

This week is gonna be a little special. Don't get all sappy-faced and doe-eyed at me though. *glares* Because this guy is HOT ASF. And I mean, I used to call him Hot D. But after a few extra iffy glares from a few 'adults' and maybe his dorky ass husband, I decided to refer to him simply as Hot Trainer. Because, let's be real. He's the only one. Hot Damn.




Of course I'm speaking of none other than that guy you wish would use a seatbelt on you in different ways. The Driver's Ed trainer. I won't refer to him as anything other than fucking Hot Trainer from here on out. Doesn't he look just like this Shiba? *stares for far too long at the pic on the left* Oh. was just wondering if certain rules of thumb apply in the apocalypse. Cuz if he looks like a dog, then I might consider a little bit of uh---anyways. 

This guy just had an anniversary. If you want to call it that. *scoffs* and well, he just had a baby. Well, the girl did. He didn't supply the sperm but um. he should have. I mean give this guy some womens to spread that FINE DNA around. *clears throat* But goddamn. Look at this shit: 




Let's just hope it's a snapping turtle cuz I'd like to get some bite marks on me if you know what I mean >:3 

Now this one is just too fucking cute. To be honest, I'm finding it hard to say anything mean about him, too. Am I getting soft? NO. FUCK THAT. Just sayin'. I'd rather spend a little time cuddling up to the guy than demeaning him. Wait. Doesn't that mean I really have lost it?




But this is just...I don't want to stab it for once. The cute. Can we leave it? The only thing that pisses me off is that little tongue there reminds me of a certain...*squints eyes* less deserving than I husband of his. But this guy, Hot Trainer, you know. He's got this super cool demeanor around him. He is really charming. He could talk your pants off. (Please do) And also do it in style ;) 

Now Dingus is definitely a word you'll hear a lot around these two. Especially that other Trainer. Not Hot Delaney. yeah him. He's a potato. Anyways. I would say that Hot Trainer couldn't ever NOT be hot, but this picture proved me other wise. I gazed at it and tortured myself for a while with the image before finding all other copies and burning them in a ritual. No one should ever have to see the un-glory that is this:


Seriously though, Hot Trainer is a pretty tame motherfucker.'s a shame. He's getting pretty damn old, too. Yknow? Like... I need to sneak in while he's sleeping and pour some of my blood on him. >:3 Bloody Mary strikes again. (Elizabeth Bathory that shit)



I would be lying if I said that was all the weird shit I could dig up on that hot ass trainer that you want to get all up in your grill (of your car).  But if you really want to see some strange shit, just stick around Town Square long enough and he'll show up. Or y'know. Wait for that other one to come around. This one is always close by. Then you can take even more photos and send them to me >:3 (and I totally won't add them to my private collection of Hot D-Trainer pics)


You can see this pretty much everywhere if you know where to look. I mean, it can get pretty monotonous being safe here in the walls, doing lessons. Gotta get your kicks where you can get em right? So if you see anyone around town that resembles one of our livestock or your Aunt Bessie's shorthair chihuahua, then send me a mail with the deets. I'll gladly post that shit in here so we can all get our kicks. I'll be here every Tuesday, so don't miss me too much while I'm gone. 


P.S. I like wine. Get on my good side. 

And remember, "Those who slay together, stay together" >:3

(permission given to use images of Vincent and his consent for the words)



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Margaret Wider

Margaret Wider Hehe really great post! XD

Odessa Valyrion

Odessa Valyrion <3 the linkeness.... why does our archive have so many animal photo's anyway! you go girl

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